Driving with Nuts

I'm still in that guilty post-Christmas mode where I feel that I need to walk more & minimise short trips in the car. I love walking, but walking leads to thinking, & walking along footpaths leads to thinking about driving (strangely) - other people's.

Being someone who can sufficiently balance to hold a two-wheel (bike) licence as well, it never ceases to amaze me just how insane those who obviously only hold a four-wheel (car) licence are. When you're on a bike, you know that there are only two things that can kill you - your own stupidity, & any car driver's. When you're riding & someone does something immensely stupid in your vicinity - whether it threatens your life or not - you've got enough time to mutter an expletive before your concentration is back on the job at hand: riding.

However, if you take this rider's awareness with you when you're walking, you've got all the time in the world to contemplate the stupidity of a driver. For that matter, you can just stop & stare at them for five minutes determining whether whatever is controlling the vehicle is human or else some phone-holding, chain-smoking, arm-waving, make-up-applying, kid-threatening, dial-twirling robot. You've got that contemplation time because, if you're a walker, you've always got plenty of time on your hands. Obviously, those in cars have somewhere very important to get to, & they're always running late. They've barely got time to update their facebook status before the lights change.

In a way, I'm glad that I have that time to walk. I think it's sometimes too stressful to be in a hurry because you're in a car & you need to launch your four-wheel-drive over car-park speed-humps like a speed-boat. Speed-humps are just one of those minor nuisances of the "outside" world - slightly firmer than pedestrians.
Maybe you just have to get to that parking spot thirty metres away, but the car in front insists on blocking your way because they stupidly want a spot right there in front of you!

This is another moment the walker can savour by just stopping to wonder what is going through the head of the obviously frustrated 4WD owner hooting at the P-plater to reverse faster than they feel comfortable doing. All the while, 4WD is swearing at the inconsiderateness of others. "Look kids!" you can imagine him saying "That <expletive> teenager just doesn't know how to drive! They need my <expletive> encouragement to get better at <expletive> parking!" You can hear the response from the child-restraint, too - "Daddy, will you teach me to be a good <expletive> driver?" "'kin oath!"